Sunday, August 2, 2015

The Golden Rule of Eid

Eid Mubarak! I hope everyone has had an enlightening Ramadan, followed by a joyful Eid celebration with your loved ones. I'm totally bummed I caught the flu bug 2 weeks into Eid. In other words, I can kiss the remaining of my visitings goodbye. 

What an emotional trainwreck I become on every Eid. It's been 6 sorrowful Eid without dad. I wished we had more time to bond, get to know and understand each other, with me as an adult; not as a rebellious teen I once was. I'm glad I seek my forgiveness. I'm glad I was the last person he talked to on his last night. I'm glad he reconciled his conflicts on his last Eid. But if I could turn back time, there's so many things I would've wanted to do better at. Let this serve as a reminder to make the best out of our Eid. Life is too unpredictable. You'll never know if this could be your last chance seeing that person. So make it count.

If you missed my 2014 Eid update, you can click here. As mentioned in my previous entry, Eid is aimed at strengthening ties with one another by visiting our relatives, friends and neighbours. This is also the day for us to seek forgiveness from one another for any wrongdoings. Ironically, amidst the mingling and reuniting, we may have unintentionally offended someone or caused a dispute over a petty misunderstanding. 

What could be a harmless question like "Bila nak kahwin?" can go to a whole different level if you're not tactful to who you directed that question to. 

It's imperative that we practice proper etiquette during our social gatherings. With that I present to you my Top 3 tips:

- The catch up. (Read: catch up eh! Not gossip!) If you haven't met for awhile, there's 1001 genuine conversations you can hold to avoid awkward moments. Ask about their health, how are they doing, how are they coping as new parents and more. Before you even know it, you just kickstarted a chain of conversation! Avoid getting involve with gossips (oh the damage word of mouth can do) and what I would call, 'Soalan cepu mas'.

The NO-NO questions
- Bila nak kahwin? Bila nak ada anak? 
- Sekolah sampai mana? Kenapa tak amek degree? Sekolah tinggi-tinggi jadi suri-rumah?
- Comparing statuses and even dowry
Golden rule #1! These questions shouldn't be directed to anyone at all. Period. You are not in their shoes, you wouldn't know their obligations. You wouldn't know if they're trying hard for a baby, if they're salvaging a broken relationship or marriage, or if they're a breadwinner. So, just don't.

- My #1 pet peeve. The janji melayu. Since it's janji melayu, saya kenalah cakap melayu kan.. *tak sia-sia malay distinction* 
Orang janji jumpa pukul 2, pukul 2 tu jugak lah dia baru nak siap. In the end, sampai pukul 4. 
Kalau tuan rumah jemput dari jam 1-4. Janganlah pukul 4 baru awak nak sampai. Kesian tuan rumah dah berkemas, nak bersiap jalan raya nanti. Bukan awak sorang saje yg nak beraya ye. Dan disebabkan sifat janji melayu awak tu, tergendalalah rancangan si tuan rumah. 

- The rombongan. Raya takkan meriah kalau tak beraya dgn rombongan. Jadi kalau beraya dgn rombongan, jangan lupa bilang tuan rumah in advanced ye. Janganlah dah on the way baru nak call. Kesian tuan rumah terkuntang-kanting nak masak, siapkan air untuk tetamu last minute. Kalau satu dua orang takpe jugak. Tapi kalau da 20 orang, siapa nak layan kan?

15 August 2015 Updated: DISCLAIMER Post saya ni tiada kaitan dengan yang hidup ataupun sudah mati. Sekiranya mempunyai persamaan, ia hanyalah sekadar kebetulan. Tapi kalau ada yang nak terasa jugak, silakan lah. Bak kata pepatah, If the shoe fits, wear it.

So that's all for my Top 3 pointers! Make it count guys. No petty misunderstanding and behaviour is worth cutting ties for. With that, please forgive all my wrongdoings, yang tersilap kata atau terkasar bahasa. Saya tetap manusia biasa yang tidak lari dari kesilapan.

Till the next entry! 


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